Turning 37: Dreams, Regrets and Why I Stopped Doing Ads

Next week is my birthday - on the 6th of November, I'm turning 37! I'm so grateful to make another round around the sun. I don’t care much about actual birthday celebrations, but I think our birthdays are a great time for reflection. Although I keep most of it just for myself, I thought I could share with you some of my dreams, plans and answer a few questions that often appear in the comments section.

There are people who say that life begins after 40 and those who post teary Instagram captions about how they’re not ready to be 30. I think I’m definitely in the first group. My 20s - especially my early 20s - sucked. I was overworked and yet somehow already in debt and in an unhappy relationship.

Second, where does allowing yourself to think that you peaked in your 20s leave you? Either living stuck in your past or desperately trying to stay young and relevant. I know both types of people in my personal life and I’m not sure which one is worse. 

Another thing is - what’s with all this pressure for women to look younger? What’s wrong with looking your own age? Why don’t men use creams or dress to look “10 years younger”?

In some way, age really is just a number - especially in cases like on this blog. It makes no difference to you as a reader whether I’m 29 or 53, right? My slow living content has very little to do with my age, except that I needed time to wise up a bit in life.

On the other hand, we all have a limited number of years - statistically around 81–82 for women in the UK and the US - so it’s much better to cherish each passing year instead of worrying about nonsense like philtrum length (the space between the bottom of the nose and the top of the upper lip) that supposedly makes you look older the longer it gets.

Come on, ladies, let’s get some sense in us. I think these little “trendy” things are just another way to bring each other down - only this time in a polite, “educated” way.

I refuse to buy into any of this nonsense - I’m simply happy where I am in life, and I’m so glad to have you here on my blog today <3

But enough of this ranting, let get into things I want to talk about today:

1. What’s with the books - are you really writing five?!

Yes! It almost feels like I’m starting a new job or beginning a new chapter in life. A few years back, it seemed like every YouTuber suddenly had a book, haha - but it’s important for me that you know this isn’t about monetising my audience. I already run a small but busy shop with my husband, and we’re doing just fine. There’s no reason for me to dedicate months of my life to writing a book that might not even sell - this is simply something I want to do.

When it comes to writing, it’s more of a personal ambition that I finally have the chance to act on and I truly hope it becomes a lifelong career. I’m not even joking when I say that by the end of my life, I hope to have published like 20 books:)

As for more concrete plans, I currently have ideas for five books - with three solid ones. Andrei and I agreed that once I get three books out (the first two about slow living and the wheel of the year and the third one fiction), we’ll reassess. Even if not a single soul buys any of those three books, I’ll probably keep on writing (hoping for the best, lol). But we might, for example, stick to online formats only, so YR Studio doesn’t lose money printing books that end up sitting in storage.

So in short - yes, I’m writing! I hope it will become a lifelong career alongside my work with YR Studio. Wish me luck!

2. Why I stopped doing ads

Not often, but occasionally I get people in the YouTube comments giving me advice on how to start getting ads, lol! I really appreciate it - I think it’s very sweet -but it also makes me wonder: how did we end up in a place where people who shill Amazon links and cheap jewellery for dear life are seen as successful?

Anyway, my last paid ad was in October 2024 and honestly, it has been the best year since. There are several reasons why I stopped taking paid partnerships and in short, here are the three main ones:

Firstly, because I hated it. My heart sank every time I received a neatly constructed PDF with “campaign details”, a “call to action” to include in my video and the request to send my vlog for review.

Secondly, because my husband is against it. Yup, Andrei is not the kind of man to tell me what to do or not to do, but he’s never supported me accepting brand deals. He always tells me: “If you want the product, just go and buy it”. This is probably one of the biggest wins of my life - my husband thinks I’m too talented and gentle (his words, not mine!) to peddle toothbrushes or water filters on my channel. Instead, he believes my time and energy are better spent focusing on our own business and my wellbeing. He’s also very supportive of my new writing chapter... I don’t deserve this man, but I’ll keep him nevertheless :)

Lastly, because I can. My inbox, like that of every other UK YouTuber (I’m not special for it), is full of offers for silk clothes, fitness rings, supplements and “non-toxic” deodorants. But since my livelihood doesn’t depend on YouTube income, I can create my videos and write my blog posts in peace... and I think you can feel that on your end. As a small business owner, I prefer to focus on quality rather than quantity and on a personal level, it just feels more elegant and meaningful.  I know this is a rather unique approach in today’s world, but I’m willing to take the gamble that, in the long run, it will be the best decision.

3. Life regrets

When you’re young and older people tell you not to rush into getting tattoos because you’ll regret them later - well, they’re right. I do regret my tattoos and I really should start looking into getting them removed, lol. Other than that, I don’t regret anything else. Every life experience - no matter how bad - led me to where I am now... and now is wonderful.

Besides, hanging on to the past is pointless and makes you weak. It can’t be changed, so you might as well move on. Follow me for more gentle and soothing life advice, lol.

4. How do I eat all that cake and stay slim?

It’s one of those questions I understand being asked, but it still makes me want to scream into my pillow a little. People see me baking a cake and then what? Do they think I sit down and eat the entire thing myself in one sitting?

We’re a family of four - including one adult, athletic man and one rapidly growing young man - and the cake is distributed accordingly. I try to have one sweet treat per day - sometimes it’s a piece of cake, other times a chocolate bar. Moderation really is the answer to everything in life - including staying slim.

5. My dreams - big and small, short and long term

There is so much, but also so little. I hope to maintain a very close-knit relationship with both of my children as they grow older and start their own families. I hope they come up with a way to heal IBD so I can eat cabbage again (apparently, they’re getting closer - there have been some breakthroughs!).

I dream of writing a book that will be read by people who have no idea who I am - they’ll just randomly pick it up from a shelf because something in the title or cover description makes them feel it’s meant for them.

A more down-to-earth dream, which will surely become a reality, is to finally have our fireplace installed and the front drive of the house done. I also really want to travel to India with Andrei. Yoga and the whole idea of the “middle path” were the real beginnings of my slow living journey all those years ago and I would love to pay my respects to “Mother India” in person.

A few closing words

This blog post is a prime example of why I need to be writing books! It was meant to be a quick post, but I’ve barely written five points and it’s already too long. If you have any questions, add them in the comments - I’ll do my best to answer.

Thank you for another wonderful year - in the shop, here on the blog and on my YouTube channel. All of this means so much to me.

Adriana x