5 Slow Living Lessons from My 30s

5 Slow Living Lessons from My 30s: On Being a Woman, Intuition and Consistency

As we’re heading into May and the English countryside feels so fresh and renewed, I think it’s a natural time for reflection. Spring and early Summer are times of intense growth and this heightened energy is felt by us humans too - at least I strongly believe so.

This year I’m turning 37 and I think it’s the first time I’ve actually started to realise that I am, in fact, a mature woman. I don’t dread the big 40. I actually don’t think much will change in the next three years - physically, mentally or emotionally. I’ll still be the same Adriana, getting excited about pumpkins and asking my husband to drive me an hour one way to some remote location just so I can see a church and marvel at the age of the stonework :)

Aging is a funny thing. Female age has been used against us for as long as humanity has existed, yet… it’s one of the most empowering things a woman can experience. At a certain age, we learn to trust ourselves and to listen to what our instinct is telling us. We’ve learned from experience and as we get older, we’re able to make better choices and judgments. We also don’t get fooled by sweet words or empty promises - we ask for facts and truth instead.

When it comes to me, I feel like I’ve only just entered this road of wisdom - many years of studying life lie ahead. So, I bow my head to more experienced women and listen to their advice. But I’m also aware that I’m being read and watched by women younger than me. I thought I’d put together a few things I can definitely say I’ve done right in life - perhaps they might inspire other women, no matter their age.

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1. Slower is better

Oh, young Adriana would lol at this! I’ve always been quick to jump into things - enthusiastic, motivated and generally a “can-do” person. But I wasn’t very focused, and I often lacked direction.

Of course, the golden middle is always best - finding joy and excitement in things, while also taking your time to think things through and slowing down enough to actually enjoy the journey. But if I had to choose just one now, at 36 years old, I’d say that slow is better.

Life is fast enough on its own - the constant chase of trends, emails, seasonal “must-haves”… no, thank you. I’ll pass. My current (and only) seasonal must-have? Fresh rhubarb :)

2. Listening to My Body (But Not Letting My Brain Gaslight Me)

Learning to listen to yourself - your body, your gut instinct, and your intuition is invaluable. Not everything in life is written in a clear font. Situations are not always straightforward and people… well, they’re people: chaotic, complicated, each one different. Trusting that quiet whisper inside often gets us out of trouble, saves us worry and helps us avoid mistakes.

But true wisdom comes when you also recognise when your own brain is trying to gaslight you. You know - like when you’ve decided to start running twice a week, but suddenly all the excuses seem perfectly reasonable. Our brains are among the most complex things on the planet, maybe even the most, so of course they can justify and explain away anything you want or don’t want to do.

If you ask me, I never want to go running. And my brain always serves up the most convincing reasons to stay home. The goal is to learn to recognise when we’re gaslighting ourselves for short-term comfort and instead choose the hard thing that brings long-term benefit.

3. Staying Consistent, Even When It’s Boring

Staying consistent beats talent and motivation. This applies to literally everything: weight loss, building a business or career, learning new skills. If you asked me for advice on any of these, “stay consistent” would be the first thing I’d say.

No, your first attempts aren’t going to be amazing. Yes, you might fail several times. But how else are you supposed to learn and actually get good at something? Doing it over and over, listening to feedback from others - and even more importantly, from yourself - and improving bit by bit is like climbing a staircase.

As the months and years go by, your consistency will push you slowly up those steps, earning you experience and confidence in your own abilities - all because you kept going.

If you ever want to see a real-life example of this, just watch my first vlogs on YouTube or my early Instagram reels. Honestly, I cringe so hard I can’t watch them now! But if you manage a few minutes, you’ll see how much my filming and editing skills have improved - even though I’ve never taken a course or had a background in filmmaking or marketing. I’ve simply been managing YR Studio’s social media for nearly seven years (and making Youtube videos for about 4)

4. Refusing Instant Gratification

We live in a world that offers instant gratification at every turn. Some things are pretty harmless - like the sugary hit of a delicious pastry you can find in every supermarket, coffee shop, petrol station and convenience store.

Other things are more sinister - like MLM marketing schemes that give people the instant feeling of being a “boss babe” running their own business, while in reality, they’re being scammed… and often bring their friends and family into it too.

Both of these things feed on our desire for instant gratification - the need to get what we want quick.

But learning to wait and work for the things you really want makes them even sweeter. Spending a few months saving for a dreamy accessory and then finally getting it, will feel so much better (and be more thought through) than buying it on a credit card and paying it off for months with interest. Same with business: learning the basics and building a customer base that genuinely trusts you takes time, but it’s real - unlike calling yourself a "boss babe" on Facebook while dragging others into pyramid schemes.

5. Not Regretting the Past, Just Learning from It

This is something that has always come naturally to me. Someone close to me has this really sad habit of constantly looking back and saying things like “I should have done that differently” or “I regret making that choice”. I truly don’t understand why she does that to herself.

The past is in the past. Bringing it into your present life - especially in the form of regret - can poison the life you’re living now. And in her case, that life is a happy, peaceful one, so why do this?

Of course we all have things we could have done better. But once it’s done and gone, the best thing you can do is accept it and move on. Learning and then letting go of the past - and not letting it ruin your present - is essential if you want to find peace of mind.

Your Turn: What Do You Feel You’ve Gotten Right?

I hope these five thoughts gave you some food for thought. I’d also love to hear: do you have any particular things in life you feel really help you or make your life better?

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